Arizona Family Counseling logo

Emotions, reactions and consequences

By Sarah Earles, MS, LPC, NCC | February 26, 2023 

Many behaviors arise from a fight, flight, freeze response to trauma. This is also known as amygdala hijack, when emotions overwhelm the brain to the point that higher thinking cannot be accessed (Holland, 2021). Sometimes, emotions are so strong that a person does not even remember what he or she did in the moment (Earles, 2022). Still, the actions have consequences. Walls punched in a fit of rage require repair. Running away from a conflict requires a walk home. Going comatose eventually requires awakening. When the higher-level brain activity re-engages, there is work to be done.

Part of therapy is gaining awareness about emotions, their triggers, and a person’s reactions. As a person gains awareness, he or she can make choices to have a better life (Seeman, 2009). The goal of gaining awareness of the consequences of negative behavior is not to create shame or blame, but rather to have appropriate guilt. As Robyn Gobbel (2022) states, “Guilt is an important human emotion given that we are a relational species–it keeps us working on self and the relationship.” Awareness and guilt can create change, hopefully in a positive direction for the person and his or her life.

Behaviors make sense in context. Behaviors also have consequences in context. While the consequence should “fit the crime,” understanding where the behavior comes from helps address the root of the problem, rather than just putting a band aid on the issue. With understanding comes the ability to make choices, the ability to create change, and maybe just maybe, the ability to take preventative action. If the person, and/or society can help account for or reduce the contexts in which consequential behaviors occur, life and the world can actually start to change to be better for all.

Recommended Reads

Female professional psychologist therapist talking to a teenage girl in office
Overcoming OCD: How a Therapist Can Help
Therapists play a vital role in helping individuals with OCD by providing a safe, supportive environment....
Read More
Upset offended teen girl daughter sitting separately with mother on sofa, mom and teenage child ignoring each other after fight at home, selective focus. Generation gap between teenagers and parents
The Scary Cycle and Kids in Survival Mode
Parenting a child that lives in survival mode can be stressful, but a dysregulated child can make for...
Read More

Many behaviors arise from a fight, flight, freeze response to trauma. This is also known as amygdala hijack, when emotions overwhelm the brain to the point that higher thinking cannot be accessed (Holland, 2021). Sometimes, emotions are so strong that a person does not even remember what he or she did in the moment (Earles, 2022). Still, the actions have consequences. Walls punched in a fit of rage require repair. Running away from a conflict requires a walk home. Going comatose eventually requires awakening. When the higher-level brain activity re-engages, there is work to be done.

Part of therapy is gaining awareness about emotions, their triggers, and a person’s reactions. As a person gains awareness, he or she can make choices to have a better life (Seeman, 2009). The goal of gaining awareness of the consequences of negative behavior is not to create shame or blame, but rather to have appropriate guilt. As Robyn Gobbel (2022) states, “Guilt is an important human emotion given that we are a relational species–it keeps us working on self and the relationship.” Awareness and guilt can create change, hopefully in a positive direction for the person and his or her life.

Behaviors make sense in context. Behaviors also have consequences in context. While the consequence should “fit the crime,” understanding where the behavior comes from helps address the root of the problem, rather than just putting a band aid on the issue. With understanding comes the ability to make choices, the ability to create change, and maybe just maybe, the ability to take preventative action. If the person, and/or society can help account for or reduce the contexts in which consequential behaviors occur, life and the world can actually start to change to be better for all.

Recommended Reads

Little rebellious girl has conflict with family.
Perpetual Problems in the Family
If couples see perpetual problems as difficult to resolve, they can learn ways to honor each oner and...
Read More
Therapist, psychologist talking and counselling to people in group therapy.
Family Therapy for Adults: Healing Grown-Up Relationships
Family therapy isn’t just for kids—adult children and parents can also benefit from it. It helps address...
Read More
en_USEN